Also, because if you say things about yourself like how unattractive you are or fat you were, or equating the two, I’ll start to believe those things about myself because I I’m way bigger than you are, and super insecure about my looks always, even though I seem confident, and especially lately with you all and your stunning girlfriends and fuck buddies. You made me feel totally beautiful and gorgeous and respected, and sometimes still make me feel attractive, like when you say things like how you like the gap in my front teeth or that my legs are muscular or you like my hair/tits/outfit/ whatever and I need to be able to maintain those memories as good ones for my own personal sanity and security, so that when the next person comes along I don’t drag her into the cycle, or invalidate her thoughts and my own good experiences. I don’t need reassurance all the time, and wouldn’t want it, or it to be forced or anything, and those little moments mean a lot to me when they happen with anyone, but I care a ridiculous amount about what you think. And because you’re not pretty, but you don’t need to be, which you can justify as being known, and logic through, but also you don’t need to be because you can still be totally attractive and nothing like pretty. Pretty is too shallow. You’re cute, and gorgeous, and handsome, and sexy, and expressive, and your jawline is killer, and your body is my favourite that I’ve been with 100% and way way way better than Sade, whose abs and million long legs can suck it, and you’re really really soft, and have the best lips. That’s better than pretty, I think. I feel lucky to have been with and be friends with someone who looks exactly like you. And I’m an aesthete so shit like that is important to me, probably more than it should be. So read this til you can believe at least one word of that compliment and let it get into your bones. Cause it matters to me, and so do you.